suicide-and-depression

Suicide and Depression – What to Do?

Do you know anyone suffering from thoughts of suicide and depression? I was reading an article from The Asian Parent about a local celebrity, Nadine Lustre, and her letter to her brother who recently passed away due to suicide when all of a sudden I found myself crying.

My own brother, about 15 years ago, almost took his own life right in front of me by stabbing his chest with a knife and I guess the article just brought back many of those dark memories. He is quite okay now, a dad of 2 kids with a 3rd baby on the way and living with his second life partner. From time to time, he still expresses sadness and depression about his first failed relationship and has had major outbursts of anger and depression, but overall, he is much better now.

I myself, dealt with major feelings of depressions and thoughts of suicide growing up. I had severe teenage angst, anxiety and panic attacks due to the pressure I was put into by my grandparents to consistently be on top of my class that carried well over into my adulthood, which I think contributed to the demise of my first marriage. While I’ve been so much better at handling negative emotions since I’ve been with my current partner of 3 years now, I must admit that it’s just lately that feelings of depression started settling in again.
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big-leap

How to take THE BIG LEAP – 8 STEPS (THE BIG MOVE PART II)

Life is full of choices and more often than not, we are left paralyzed as to what decision to take next. As much as life is a never-ending road of lessons that needs to be travelled so we can move on to the next higher level, many of us choose to stay where we are simply because we are just too lazy or even scared to take responsibility for the challenging consequences that our new choices might bring. We’d rather stay in our comfort zones and revel in there. Anyway, we feel okay, so why bother?

I was in that zone once and it took a while for me to get up, pop the bubble I was in and jump to a new adventure. And when I finally did,  so many exciting events and learnings happened that I think just made me a better and happier person now. It involved a lot of saying no to opportunities, people and events that no longer matter in the greater scheme of things and it involves saying yes to a lot of new and scary stuff. And I wouldn’t be this happy had I not taken that big leap towards this life I’m now living.

So how did it come to this? What did I do? How does one take the big leap of their life?

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2017

Hello 2017! Three Questions to Ask Yourself This New Year…

It’s almost 3AM, Philippine time, on the first day of the new year and this is the first time, in a long time, that I am able to breathe, relax and write down my thoughts… I hope this is a good sign… sort of like saying that the new year will bring me more relaxed moments to just be. *crossing my fingers*

Anyway, the house is now all cleaned up, quiet and dark after a whole day of preparation — running errands, picking up groceries and slaving away in the kitchen so we can all have a feast come media noche. And hurrah! Indeed, we were able to fill our dining table with yummy dishes that I think will last for another week just like our Noche Buena did last Christmas which lasted until New Year’s Eve. Hihihi! We feel so blessed! No more cooking the rest of the week, yey! I’m sure a lot of you can relate.  Continue reading

responsibility

How to Take 100% Responsibility For Your Life

A BUSY introduction

I know, I know, I KNOW. It’s been 10 days since my last post and I have so much to share! Before baby Tuz’s first birthday, my life partner, Mahal, and I have been having sleepless nights taking care of work, parental stuff and domestic duties because we wanted to celebrate our baby’s first birthday on the date of his birthday itself, which was the 17th, a Thursday. We could have just decided to have it on a weekend so all our work responsibilities have already been done by that time and we can all relax and enjoy our son’s birthday beach celebration. Well, we did enjoy, but it could have been better. And it’s all because we wanted it celebrated on the birthdate itself, which, now, looking back, has been a semi-terrible idea! Continue reading

Jumpstart a Healthy Lifestyle

How to Jumpstart a Healthy Lifestyle – Here are 4 Tips

HOW I’VE LOST TRACK OF MY HEALTHY LIFESTYLE

We’ve been eating out a lot more frequently than usual not just because of lack of time to visit the local market for organic stuff (we have to be there by 5am to get the freshest produce and catch, unfortunately, our body clock keeps on moving because of Baby Tuz‘s fussiness) but because I’ve been feeling like celebrating lately. I know a big part of our nation and the world is mourning right now because of certain events particularly having ex-dictator/president Marcos buried in Libingan ng mga Bayani plus Donald Trump’s startling  win in the recent U.S. Elections, but in spite of all of that, I want to focus on the positive and just celebrate life! Looking at our little family, we still have so many things to be thankful for, hence the eating out and mini celebrations as of late… Continue reading

letting go

The Power of Letting Go

I just received good news when I woke up this morning! I was on the way out of the bathroom when my phone rang. My phone rarely rings because people rarely call me since they can always contact me online. In a split second, I thought it was Leylan, the electrician who fixed the electrical wiring in the bedroom yesterday who said he will come back today to fix our broken washing machine. But when I looked at my phone… guess who??? It’s my lawyer! Continue reading

meditation

The Power of Meditation and What I Learned in Taiwan

The year is almost over and I still have so many things to accomplish on my plate — work, business, pleasure and leisure, passions and hobbies, the upkeep of the house and everything it entails, maintenance of good health, taking care of relationships, etc.

But since we only have 24 hours a day to do everything we can to be productive and live a balanced life, more often than not, it really takes a strong willpower and determination to be able to squeeze in everything we need to do day in and day out including the not-so-important and urgent tasks. Because of this need to be “superwoman” (or superman for our men out there) in so many ways, I remembered the importance of meditation. I am after all, a full-time and hands-on work-from-home mom, which means I am an all-around 24/7 caregiver, helper, yaya, breadwinner, homemaker, partner, cheerleader, and everything else in between and I need all the help and support I can get to remain sane, healthy and happy. I am just so thankful because I have a male counterpart doing same things I do to lessen the burden while at the same time doubling the joy and fulfillment in our little family. But still, there are days when I get so overwhelmed and having a great partner is not enough… Continue reading

surfing

Surfing – a History of Conquering Love and Fear

When I started this new blog, I’ve shared with you that I’m re-reading Gretchen Rubin’s Happiness Project because I want to bring more happiness into my life, the kind that really comes from within me and not the type that is pressured into my life by other people or caused by pride and envy (which is why I started this whole new blog and let go of my old persona even if people close to me advised me against it). I want to be just me. Be me. Be Jen. Which is why I am writing a lot more now about my life, my thoughts, my past experiences, etc. because I am first and foremost a diarist more than a typical blogger, more than a marketer or any other kind of writer. I like looking at my own past experiences, enjoying those happy forgotten memories and using the positive energy they give me to bring more good things into my present life so I can forge ahead with a bit more wisdom, inspiration and strength towards a brighter future. And one thing about my not-so-far-off past that gave (and still gives) me so much joy is SURFING.

This is more of a story of love and letting go of fear rather than a pure guide to surfing. Although there’ll be bits and pieces about how to surf, where to surf, how much it costs and what not, more than anything, I’d be sharing with you a photo journal about it and how this water sports activity has changed my life and influenced me (hopefully for the better). Continue reading

How to Not Worry

How to Not Worry in Life and Love

We were having lunch a while ago when I suddenly blurted out to Mahal“OMG! I’m so excited!” He looked at me and I saw in his eyes that he was wondering what was I excited about. So I immediately added “I’m excited about all our upcoming travel plans both near and far!” Like this month we plan to celebrate Halloween at Nuvali, we plan to do some hotel hopping in Manila, and we want to explore those parts of Laguna we haven’t visited yet. Then next month we’ll be in Batangas. We already booked an overnight stay at Acuaverde for baby Tuz’s first birthday. Then come December, for Christmas until New Year, my parents want to spend it at the beach with the whole family and I’m already calling various beach resorts to inquire for their cheapest rates. Then on January next year, we’ve already booked flights to Cebu and  we’ll be going home to Oslob. Then on my birthday month, February, I want to explore a place we haven’t been to yet (Tuguegarao perhaps?) then the whole summer I want us to go back to Boracay, visit Aklan, Capiz, Romblon and Masbate! So exciting!

After a little while, now that I think about it, I started to worry a bit, like, okay, how are we going to do all that with baby Tuz in tow? Where will we get our budget? Can we really travel that many times like I used to do by myself before? Hmmm… Then I remembered that it’s not good to worry so much about it and just let things unfold. So this is what this blog post is about. How to not worry whether about life in general or even love

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surfing

Follow Your Fear So You Can Follow Your Heart


 “The more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it… The more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us and the growth of our soul. “ – Steven Pressfield of  The War of Art

Marie Forleo is one of those amazing women that I follow and emulate as much as I possibly can (aside from Oprah). And in her Tuesday’s Marie TV episode she talked about following our fears.

By fear, it means the good kind of fear that we know once we overcome, will change our life for the better. It’s the directive kind of fear like an idea of doing something that we’ve always wanted to do. Something that the deeper and wiser part of us wants so damn bad! Not the kind that will have us get run over by a bus, lol!

Come to think of it, when I look back on my life, a lot of the things I did in order to follow my bliss was I followed my fear first. Again, by fear, Marie and I both mean something that can make us doubt ourselves and our capabilities but once we do it, will bring us tremendous joy. Let me give you mine… Continue reading